One of the hardest but also the most rewarding job in the world is being a single mother. Raising children alone requires resilience, adaptability, organisational skills, and sometimes a little creativity, too. Tested by single mothers, these single mum life hacks will help make daily life more manageable, efficient, and enjoyable.
1. Plan family meals
In a single mum’s life, time is a valuable commodity. Making meals from scratch every night after a hectic day is simply not sustainable in the long run. But how do you prepare healthy family meals in the little time that you have after school or work? The answer is: Plan & prepare as much as possible in advance, and keep mealtimes simple. Kids love fuss free foods and crudites, so plan and shop, then set aside 2 to 3 hours on a Sunday to prepare meals that keep for a few days. What doesn’t keep, can be frozen, and enjoyed at the end of the week. Here are some simple tips and tricks:
- Keep meals simple: chicken fajitas and pitas with humous or chicken and salad is a quick yet nutritious meal.
- Cook fresh pasta sauce and fill it in jars – it keeps for weeks in the fridge.
- Make larger quantities of freezable meals, such as chicken stew, beef casserole, chili con carne, Bolognese sauce, curries, and soups.
- Prepare crudites, such as carrots, tomatoes, cucumbers, celery, etc. They can be served as sides for at least 3 days without spoiling.
- Have easy to cook veggies like broccoli in the fridge so you always have a healthy side.
- Set lunchbox food aside after shopping for quick preparation and to ensure you have enough for the kids to last the week.
2. Set up a family command centre
Trying to keep track of kids timetables, homework, library books, appointments, permission slips, clubs, and invites can cause the most organised single parents a headache. The solution is what you could call “a family command centre”. By that we mean a dedicated space in the house where every family member can store important items and papers until they are needed. The hallway usually works well, but it can also be in a corner of the kitchen or any other part of the house that is frequently used and not ‘out of the way.’ A family command centre can include:
- a wall calendar is crucial so that everyone can see at a glance who is where when
- a pinboard helps to keep those permission slips and invites safe and in full view.
- a storage box, basket, or draw for each child for schoolbooks, homework, smaller musical instruments, and sports club items means there is never a last minute scramble trying to find these items.
- hooks for bags, jackets, and keys
- a station for device charging
Colour codes are useful if you have two or more kids. Each person gets a colour for their belongings, be it their homework folder, water bottles, or calendar entries. This way, everyone can see at a glance which items are theirs and whose soccer practice is set for a particular date.
Rather than a panicked morning scramble, have a Sunday afternoon “meeting” for just 15 minutes to go over the week ahead. Look at the calendar, discuss special requests, prepare, and/or delegate appropriately, so that everyone is aware of their responsibilities. This is one of our favourite single mum life hacks!
If you have teenagers, sharing some information digitally is another option. Shared family calendars, shopping lists, reminders, and photos of vital papers guarantee you and your teens always have all the information they need at hand.
3. Organise your wardrobe(s)
Getting the kids ready for school and choosing an outfit for work shouldn’t take up valuable early morning minutes. Store your work clothes in a separate section of your wardrobe, so you can quickly mix and match outfits in the mornings. Do the same with school uniforms (or school outfits if you have children in sixth form), but make sure your kids check their timetable the evening before school. This way you can avoid stressful mornings due to missing socks or dirty sports kits that never made it into the washing machine. Having several sets of school uniform and more than one sports kit can also avoid drama.
4. Create a support network
There is some truth in the saying “it takes a village”. You cannot raise kids on your own without any support – it takes more than one person. Nowadays, parents often choose who will be part of that support network. This can be close family, friends, neighbours, child minders, or mentors because single parents not only need male and female role models for their children, but they also require help from time to time. Building a network takes time, but here is what single mums can do:
- Share childcare with other single parents or reliable friends – not just to save money and time but also so that you have backup when you need someone to mind your kids at short notice.
- Engage with your neighbours to see who you might be able to share the school run with. Try to get to know local families who might be able to help in an emergency or provide last-minute backup when your child is ill or you’re running behind.
- Ask family to help out – either ad hoc or regularly. Maybe grandma can pick the kids up from school every Tuesday and make them tea. Offer favours to relatives with children, so that you don’t feel awkward if you need to ask in return.
- You can also have paid help as a backup plan. Having a nursery, a play school, a reliable child minder or a babysitter, who may take last-minute requests, offers peace of mind.
5. Change how you pay bills
If you don’t need to worry about running out of cash at the end of the month and if you trust your payees, agree to pay subscriptions and regular bills by direct debit. This will ensure invoices get paid on time, and you don’t have another 10 things to worry about. It might even save you a little money as many companies offer discounts for direct debit arrangements.
6. Have a money-saving plan
Many single mothers experience financial strain, especially following separation or divorce. Therefore, good money management is imperative. To get an idea where you can save, keep a record of your incoming and outgoing money for at least a month to learn where you spent your money. You will be surprised to see how much goes on impromptu purchases and subscriptions you don’t even use.
If your children are old enough, talk to them about your family’s financial situation and how they can help. Age-appropriate budgeting talks impart priceless lessons for life while lowering the demand for superfluous items.
Be smart about purchasing items that your kids will quickly outgrow, for example children’s clothes, sports kit, and toys. Second hand clothes, retail sales, freecycle sites, and parents preloved sites can provide high-quality products at the fraction of the cost of new items. Don’t skimp on essentials, such as home, breakdown, or private health insurance. This can backfire terribly.
7. Create morning calm
Mornings can make or break you. The negative mood created by morning mayhem can last for hours, so try to find ways to start your day on a positive note by being organised the day before. These are our single mum life hacks to combat manic mornings:
- Pack school and work lunches the evening before and refrigerate them.
- Ask your children to set the table for breakfast the night before, so all they need to do is take perishable goods out of the fridge in the morning.
- Delegate morning tasks amongst your children.
- Leave packed bags by the front door, so nothing gets forgotten in the morning rush.
- Prepare your coffee machine to you only need to press the ‘start’ button.
- Arrange everyone’s clothes and footwear.
Establishing a routine avoids arguments and bargaining. Children resist less when they know what to expect. If you have young children, try and use a visual chart in their bathroom or bedroom, so they know what they need to do each morning. It’s a proven single mum life hack that makes life easier.
8. Look after yourself
Single mums are so used to putting everyone else first that they tend to neglect their own needs. Running on empty, however, can lead to burnout. Don’t neglect yourself but make time for self-care. If that means leaving dirty dishes in the sink, so be it. Here are a few self-care tips for single parents (and these are single mum life hacks because your health is vital if you always want to be 100% there for your kids):
- Make sure you get enough quality sleep. Staying up late whilst the kids are asleep may be tempting but long-term sleep deprivation compromises physical health, mood, and even decision-making.
- Don’t neglect your physical health. Regular checkups, management of chronic conditions, and prompt action help to ensure that little problems don’t turn into major health issues. After all, your family depends on you which is why private health insurance is particularly important for single mums. In addition to private cover for yourself, try to get the best health insurance for kids so should they have accidents or fall ill, it can be dealt with quickly and by experts.
- Look after your mental health: Therapy, support groups, and counselling can offer important coping mechanisms and outlets.
Learn to focus on what’s important: Life coaching for single parents can help you create an action plan, which will help you overcome challenges and set and achieve future goals.
9. Don’t strive for perfection
Children don’t need Pinterest-perfect birthday parties, spick and span designer homes, or be top of their class in every subject. They need your love and attention first and foremost, so try not to be too perfectionist and keep a degree of flexibility within your routines. Don’t stress if your home is messy and a homework handed in late. These things happen and are part of life. Letting go of high expectations can often be the first step to a less stressful and happier family life.
10. Learn to delegate
We have all been guilty of saying “it’s quicker if I do it myself” whether it’s tying kids’ shoelaces or tidying up their toys. If you want to have an easier life in the long run, you have to stop doing everything yourself and start teaching your kids a little more independence – even if that means a burned dinner or a messy bedroom.
Allocate tasks according to your kids’ ages, i.e. let your little ones tidy their toys or set the table whilst your teenagers can be given more important duties like going to the shop to get dinner ingredients. This will teach your children important life skills. Always remind your kids to check their timetable and the wall calendar in the family command centre to see what needs to be done to save yourself having to remind each family member of their chores.
We hope that you like our single mum life hacks! Please let us know your own ideas to make other solo mums’ lives easier. Doing the job of two people is double exhausting, so whilst it’s great to be super organised, don’t be too hard on yourself if at times you feel too exhausted and can’t keep up with your daily chores. Sometimes a little extra sleep is all you need to feel re-energised and tackle another day.
